June 2009
19 posts
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
He said “I don’t get it,” in a way that made me realize: “he does not understand at all,” and that an explanation, in this case, was not necessary, could not help.
I don’t think he understood that either.
And then I pictured myself having to explain everything to him all the time, forever, because, it seemed, he might never understand, and so I just smiled and shrugged, though it’s possible I...
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
I fell asleep with the phone in my hand, at my ear, and her on the other end of the line.
It is not always a very smart idea to point out that an apostrophe is in the wrong place.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
Amtrak train, instead of an airplane, from NYC to Atlanta: a terrible or terrific idea?
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
Instead of an essay, can I turn in a tightly edited list?
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
They are the type of couple that says “I miss you,” too much and too soon.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
The only thing we have in common is that we do not dislike Nutella.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
This new plan involves too much time for naps.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
His origin story.
3 tags
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
If you want to meet a jerk disguised as a Genius, there’s an App for that.
3 tags
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
The Mac “Genius” suggested that I sell my laptop on Ebay “To a collector. As an Object.”
This time, on the way up, the stairs were unsettling, but I did not trip or fall.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
Electronic devices that I broke in unrelated accidents this week: one laptop hard drive, one heart.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
Let’s not date and say we did.
2 tags
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
The trick is to tell me that I am hilarious.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
You have a baby.
Why are you having your own birthday party at a bowling alley?
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
She is the type of girl that is always carrying too many bags.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
I was the star of that shiva call.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
…If, by “married,” you mean “camping.”
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
Okay, maybe I have been half-seriously quoting e-mails from The Kabbalah Centre in casual conversation.
Things I Don't Understand And Definitely Am Not...
That fight was fun.